Norton of Morton

Read a new instalment of Norton of Morton every Saturday at 4 o'clock

Saturday 26 March 2016

5 things a gentleman should possess

In which G.M. Norton considers the five essential things that every gentleman needs.


I was busy being late to an appointment the other day, while raising my eyebrows in surprise and chuckling to myself. Then I had an epiphany. I could think of five things that every would-be gentleman needs. 

And here they are.

1. A watch  

A gentleman should always try to be punctual so a watch is quite important to help achieve this. Of course, if you're like me, being on time is something you need to improve on. So having a timepiece allows me to see exactly how many minutes, hours and days I am late.
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Saturday 19 March 2016

Cheerio Winter, What-ho Spring!

In which G.M. Norton is full of the joys of Spring.


I can hear you now. "Norton, dear boy. You're jumping the gun somewhat! Spring starts next week when the clocks go forwards."

Well astronomically speaking, today is the last day of Winter. Tomorrow is the equinox, where day and night is of equal length. 

For the purposes of this periodical post, I’m siding with the astronomers. Besides, I'm feeling full of the joys of Spring.
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Saturday 12 March 2016

The Red Trouser Defence League

In which G.M. Norton joins Country Life in celebrating le pantaloon rouge.


These are troubling times, chumrades. Troubling times, indeed. I’m not referring to world atrocities, you understand. This periodical is a sanctuary to take your mind off truly serious matters. Today, I’m writing about the decline of red trousers, standard issue for the English country gentleman.
 
Fabulous illustration courtesy of Country Life, with thanks
It would be sheer folly to suggest that red trousers are facing extinction. Thankfully, the likes of Cordings would never allow such a sartorial travesty to occur. But Country Life magazine have been moved enough to pen an impassioned plea to reclaim the red trouser.

Please do read the full article but here is my favourite part. The rousing words put a lump in my throat:
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Saturday 5 March 2016

On film: The Maltese Falcon

In which G.M. Norton enters into the murky world of expensive birds. 


Following on from last Saturday’s collection of British film noir baddies, I thought that it was only fair to write about what is considered to be the first film noir - the 1941 production of The Maltese Falcon.
Based on the Dashiell Hammett novel of the same name, this is the second Hammett inspired film to grace this periodical - the other being The Thin Man.
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