Norton of Morton

Read a new instalment of Norton of Morton every Saturday at 4 o'clock

Saturday 30 March 2013

The fellowship of the moustache


In which G.M. Norton finds himself in a hairy situation.


Today the humble moustache has all but vanished from the faces of young men, cast into the dark abyss of the past with a disapproving glare for good measure.

Instead of sporting magnificent upper lip appendages, our mixed-up society has sought fit to proudly wear over-sized babygrows and dip themselves in creosote instead.

Thankfully, there is still a small band of supporters intent on reawakening the moustache by proudly displaying graspable appendages and challenging the clean-shaven status quo of modernity.

Not one to hold back, I have decided to join this most chivalrous of movements and become a fully-fledged member of the Fur Face Fellowship. After all, 2013 is the Year of the Gentleman and every self-respecting gentleman should at one stage or another sport a sprouting of hair above their top lip.

Ladies and gentlemen, please allow me to introduce you to my infant moustache.
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Saturday 23 March 2013

Terrific titfers


In which G.M. Norton ponders one of the great mysteries of our age – the sad decline of hats.

The beginning of Spring is a tantalising time of the year, full of starts and stops and bitter retreats as it engages in a deadly duel with its arch enemy Winter. As we all know, eventually Spring will emerge victorious (of sorts) as light and warmth defeats darkness and cold.

However, as the brave and plucky daffodils poke their heads from the recently frozen ground, we do not have to follow suit and risk cold craniums. That’s when the humble hat becomes our saviour. Not only does a hat offer protection against the elements during inclement weather but it also transforms you from dowdy to dapper.


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Saturday 16 March 2013

Style icon: Sir Michael Caine

In which G.M. Norton announces his latest Style Icon inductee. 


Hello avid readers and welcome to the latest exciting instalment of your favourite weekly periodical, brought to you every Saturday at four o’clock.

My latest posting concerns the famous thespian, Sir Michael Caine who I have sought fit to induct into my Style Icon list, joining Sir Roger Moore and Cary Grant.
"My name is Maurice Micklewhite."

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Saturday 9 March 2013

Behold the beneficiary boutiques!


In which G.M. Norton reveals the treasure he has recently managed to plunder at bargain prices.


I must confess, I love a good charity shop. Last Christmas, I managed to cobble together a party outfit for the princely sum of £38 and it’s fair to say that I am continuing to unearth even more bargains (to the detriment of my wardrobes).

This year, I have made a vow of sorts to buy the majority of my clothes from charity shops (or ‘beneficiary boutiques’ as my chum Bruce Partington-Plans refers to them). As I know what sharp eyes you’ve got, I have afforded myself a little get-out by writing that is my intention to ‘buy the majority’ – a chap must allow himself sufficient leverage to snaffle something extra special from time to time.


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Saturday 2 March 2013

Read all about it – featured in Pretty Nostalgic


In which G.M. Norton makes an exciting announcement. 

 

I am rather excited to reveal that my babblings have made it inside the March/April issue of Pretty Nostalgic, 'the independent vintage lifestyle magazine celebrating everything that's brilliantly British'.

If you’ve not yet had the pleasure of perusing a copy of Pretty Nostalgic, I would hastily recommend that you toddle over to your nearest W.H. Smiths. Although it is quite pricey at £8 a copy, it is a first class publication and when you consider that it is completely independent, I think it’s worth every penny. The illustrations and photographs are a wonder to behold and worth the reading fee alone.

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